B.E. #12 The Birth Story

Eagerly anticipating the arrival of Poppy, CC, Laura and Ryan on Sunday, we spent the week trying to keep to a schedule while still having fun as a family. The week was spent building up to Saturday where both girls would get special 'baskets' for special reasons. Sophia, because she has learned how to read her letters and make their sounds, and Bella because she is about to become a big sis….

The girls and I did a big grocery trip to Carre Four before the arrival of baby Tobin and on Saturday the whole family went to meet up with Cheryl and her girls and go swimming. The problem was that the whole night before, Friday night, I was up and down with intense feeling of pressure in my lower abdomen. It would come and go, was not a real 'tightening' of pain, but just un-comfortableness in a steady rhythm. I did not sleep.

That morning I told David that this baby may just come soon, but the 'pressure' subsided some and we packed up for a morning of swimming with friends. I still did not feel completely right and was extremely tired. We made sure Cheryl was on call in case we needed her to watch the kids, she was completely willing.

That same afternoon everyone laid down for naps and I was so looking forward to it. Almost as soon as I laid down again the 'pressure' came back in consistent measure with more of a contraction feeling. I timed them at about 8-10 minutes apart but they were not that painful, but prevented sleep nonetheless. By 3:00 we started talking scenarios of what would/could/should happen. Poppy and CC were arriving early the next morning, who would meet them, do we call Cheryl now????

We decided that just I would go up to the hospital to see what was going on, I did this and was put on a monitor for 30 minutes, where, though I felt 4-5 'pressure' sensations I only had two real contractions, fifteen minutes apart and was not dilated at all. Like normal, this was not real labor. The doctor told me to go home, rest and come back if they got more consistent, or come back whenever I wanted…

The pains did subside some, we went over to our friend's apartment for dinner and I just felt a few contractions in those 2 hours….but I just knew the night would be a different story.

We emailed Cheryl before bed just to confirm her readiness. We went to bed a little after 10 p.m. and I just prayed that I could make it until morning. The contractions started up again at least every 15 minutes, sometimes longer, sometimes closer together, sometimes very strong, and sometimes not so much. So I still thought that these were probably not 'productive' but causing pain and sleeplessness all the same (just like with Bella). So here I thought we would roll into this C-section labor free, but the plans had changed. I knew things would be so much better if we could make it until 6 a.m. and get our plans in place. I also know the risks involved in multiple C-sections so I was not going to let myself get into full on labor with contractions 5 minutes apart or too intense.

David called the van driver to pick up his parents without him (they were arriving at 6:40 a.m. but probably would not get out of the airport until after 8 a.m.) and take them back to his hotel. He called Cheryl and asked her to come after they ate breakfast. I went on to the hospital by myself at around 7:15 a.m. They put me on the monitor even though they knew the baby would be delivered that day. I stayed in contact with David who had quite the stressful morning trying to organize all of this. God provided in such amazing ways, every minute detail seen to by him so that our family could be there together and David could see me through the surgery!

My contractions were 8 minutes apart and my doctor was called, he had two other appointments that morning and was so very willing to work around them. At first they came and told me that the baby would be delivered at 8:15 a.m. To which I replied that my husband was not here, could we wait. Dr. Nopadol then called me and we talked and he said as long as I could bear the pain then we could wait until 10:30. Now that I was in the hospital and ready to go I said I could wait. This was also much better because then his parents and Laura and the girls could probably make it to the hospital in time as well.

They gave me IV fluids and put me in a room to wait. Cheryl stayed in our apartment with the girls and then passed them off to Poppy and CC at their hotel once they arrived. David arrived to be with me by 8:45ish, and the doc almost wanted to do it right then, but when we asked if we could stick with the 10:30 time he understood. So we waited a little while longer...family arrived, David went out to speak with them and fill them in a little. He came back and put his scrubs on and got ready to watch his son be delivered.

They took me to the 'operation' room and prepped me with pain meds and epidural. This was one of my biggest fears going in, the past two times I had had issues with the epidural and the ability to still feel intense pain. I was so glad when Cheryl called a little after 9 a.m. and prayed for me about these anxieties and the whole birth. God gave me great peace about it, the anesthesiologist was great and I was very relaxed through it all (if you know me and needles and blood this is a big praise).

Tobin Elias came out crying (a great sign), and he is healthy and doing well. We were so blessed through this whole process. Another prayer is that he will nurse well and so far he has done great….

We will see what God has in store as we get used to being a family of five!

Bangkok Edition #11 Introducing...

Tobin Elias Coker

April 10th, 2011 (two days before planned delivery and 9 days before actual due date)
7 lbs. 7 oz.
20 inches long

Tobin (pronounced TOE-ben) is a shortened form of the Hebrew name Tobijah/Tobias. The meaning of the name is "Yahweh is (my) good" and/or "pleasing to Yahweh."

Elias (pronounced uh-LIE- us), which is the Greek form of Elijah, means "My God is Yahweh."

So in naming him Tobin Elias, we make it our prayer that he will one day reflect the name he bears. That is, we pray that Tobin will become a man whose God is Yahweh. Moreover, we pray that Tobin would know, understand, and experience God’s goodness in Christ Jesus and he would be a man whose life is pleasing to Yahweh. Will you join us in praying for him towards this end?

B.E. #10 contractions

I was really looking forward to just kind of coasting into this delivery...a decent nights' sleep up early, shower and go. Opposite of the previous two. This is supposed to happen in three days. The only problem with that is that last night I started feeling pretty good pressure in my low abdomen. Just intense pressure that kept me awake, not a real 'tightening.' In the morning it subsided, we went to our friends' pool at a really nice hotel. I still was not feeling well. And extremely tired...

I couldn't wait for an afternoon nap. BUT as I laid down the intense pressure came back. I decided to time it....8 minutes apart exactly and consistent. Poppy and CC and Laura and Ryan are en route right now. What do I do? Am I in labor? It is not that painful, just really uncomfortable, and preventing rest. As it got a little more painful we decided I would go up to the hospital by myself to get checked out.

They put me on the monitor. I felt the 'pressure/pain' about 5-6x in the thirty minutes I was there, but it only registered 2 real contractions, 15 minutes apart, and I am not dilated at all. All that means is that this is not labor yet. My doc said to go home, though the baby may come earlier than Tuesday. I am still having these 'contractions' I don't think they are going away. The doc said to come back if they get closer together or if I just want to because I am too uncomfortable. So we wait...we wait for our family to arrive. And so much for coasting into this delivery with head held high, energized and ready. I will be ready, but tonight will most likely be sleepless, and who knows what tomorrow may bring, a baby Coker, maybe....

B.E. #9 river boat to the mall

After our date we went with our friends on the boat taxi to a huge mall (one that was burned down during all the riots awhile ago, but is back up and running and quite swank).



You kind of have to 'hop on' they only stop it for a second. And you cannot really call it a complete stop, with kids this is interesting...but doable.


We went to this place first, which was mainly for reading, great for kids six and up...we soon left and went to a play place..


We let Bella go up and down the slide by herself... Until she just would not 'sit down' first. We really have come to realize that she has an unhealthy sense of fear...she has NONE. We know her pain tolerance is high, but she will jump from things really high, not knowing how she could get hurt, we just happen to be there most of the time. She would stand at the top of the slide, not sit, and just tumble on down, and get up laughing...

Training her has been hard, and we need to really get on it now. She will literally run from us laughing when we tell her to 'come here.' Then after discipline, she will do it. But I still think she thinks it is all just a game. In our world of travel and busy airports and malls, we need our children to heed our voice well. Bella's 'happy go luckiness' is making this difficult. Though her cleverness is cute, It can be scary at times, and dangerous, so we are making a push to train hard and stay consistent...





Sophia had fun playing with this girl, though they could not communicate verbally...I told her in Thai that I could not speak Thai, and then guessed at what she was saying, and answered her in English: 'her name is sophia...she is three, etc.'

B.E. #8 An afternoon date 38.5 weeks

I will say I really hate pregnancy photos. The other pictures taken this day did not have the shadow but they made me look so fat. I am vain, I guess. A sad confession. I am looking real large and in charge in this pic too, but oh well, in the name of 'capturing' our lives, I relent. But I am almost 39 weeks pregnant, had my last check up today before the 'big day,' and all is going well.

Our friend Cheryl and her girls called us up and said 'you guys really need to go on a date before this baby comes!' And we said, 'no thanks.' JUST KIDDING. Of course we went. They came and sat in our apartment while the girls napped and we went out for a late lunch, Indian food, of course.

It was wonderful. We talked about our lack of anxiety over having baby #3 in less than a week. This a gift from God. 'Are you anxious?' I asked him. 'not really, are you?' 'not really.' And then we went on to talk about all the family vacations we would like to take around the world, when the kids get old enough, of course.

Thanks Cheryl and girls for letting us go out one last time before we have another new born! What a gift!

B.E. #7 Fast Friends

We were so blessed to meet the family of six that lived upstairs. They left yesterday, and while the parents were packing we had 3 of the 4 kids play with Sophia and Bella (the newborn stayed at home of course). I wish I had recorded all that was said and done, it was hilarious. Three creative brains, a 6 year old boy, and two almost four year old girls, (and then of course the almost two year olds, Bella and her friend). They plotted, they played, they went on adventures, they were the three musketeers, and then they were 'good guys' and then they were 'bad guys'.





plotting and scheming


she looks like she is scheming...


game faces on


The Three Musketeers



packed up for their battle and adventure


Their journey took them to the kitchen floor...for them who knows where it was, they were probably on the open sea!

The kids got along great, and had so much fun together. We miss them already.

B.E. #6: Busy (and no pictures)

Where did last week go? Here is what it looked like in snippet form:

Monday (3/28): I go to my check up by myself. The doctor tells me he will be leaving the day we had scheduled the C-section, but he could still do it, just not follow up (it is the Thai water splashing, new year holiday), we would need to decide to do it one day earlier, or keep the 12th, but he was not wanting to wait until his return as it is too close to the due date. I could make no decision without David, so I left it at that. He also said the baby seemed 'small' which really worried me, then he measured me and said it seemed fine, but we could do a 'scan' if I wanted, or wait until next week and do one. Without David I opted to wait.

Tuesday (3/29): we took Bella back to the doctor, her ear infection still not cleared up, more medicine needed... (our pediatrician also tells us she will be gone April 13-16, when normally she would be checking on our new baby every day). She also said the only concern with the baby being small would be if he is still growing, if their is enough fluid, and if the placenta is still doing its job, if not then we would need to have the baby earlier. We decided to try to go up and see my ob/gyn and get a scan, but he was gone for the day.

Wednesday 3/30: We catch my doc before he is about to leave and decide we want an ultrasound and to continue to talk about the delivery date. The scan relieved us so much. We know we are not in control, but if the baby was not getting proper nutrition or measuring weeks behind we wanted to know. He was measuring right on, is not huge, but was 7 lbs at that time with almost two weeks to go. And, because family is coming to help, arriving on the 10th, we decided to keep the 12th delivery date, my doc said he would drive back if something is needed. Then Sophia saw the egg cartons in his office and asked about those, that is when we found out that he raises free range chickens and sells their eggs, he has a little farm two hours away in an area where people have vacation homes. He was so open and inviting and said we could come anytime. He showed us a little youtube video about his farm....crazy things you learn about your doctor when your three-year old asks an innocent question!

I am not sure what happened on Thursday. I do know we have not done much formal 'preschool' this week. I am letting her play, play, play when friends are around, it is fun to watch and great for the girls. We did swim once or twice when we were not busy at doc appts.

By Thursday though we did have to start dealing with the mosquito infestation in our apartment. The lady who cleans told us to spray under the beds when we go out and it should help. But we only had a little bit of spray. The first day we did this, it killed about fifty mosquitoes (left all over the girls' room) and ignited the other fifty to invade the rest of the apartment. From there we decided we needed to: buy good spray, search for mosquito nets that did not need to be hung from the ceiling (the girls, from day one, would get about five new bites a night), and try to find out how they were getting in. We have sprayed a few more times, and they are getting better, and I did find the right kind of mosquito nets too, finally. By Saturday, this did take an hour or two off of David's work schedule, but it was necessary. He is leading the mosquito war in our house! The nets seem to be working great, and the girls have gotten used to them (like sleeping in tents).

Friday 4/1: (the mosquito war in progress), we played outside a lot with friends. Sophia had a friend over to play which was great, and they started speaking Sophia's own made up language, a mix between chinese, thai, and dutch of all things. It was hilarious to hear and watch these interactions. Friday night we met up with friends who live in our same city in China. We love this family and they will be here until the baby comes too, we hope to see them more. But because it was Friday night, we wanted to avoid traffic at all cost, we took a boat taxi right off our little river. It was fun, but Sophia's first comment was: "it is not as fun as Poppy's boat." I had to agree. And we did have to walk a ways after to get to the mall, but the girls did great, and David carried Bella in the ergo. We ate dinner with our friends, talked, walked around Toys R Us, and Sophia had a blast hanging out with C's 12 year old and 8 year old (approx ages). We introduced them to Cold Stone Creamery (did I say Bangkok has everything), and then took the long walk to the trains to get home. We took the sky train to the end of our street and then a taxi down the street (now, that may seem lazy, but it is a really LONG street, the girls had already walked a mile, it was hot, and it was night time in Bangkok and in our area that means things become very rated 'R.'). The adventure was fun, but tiring, and so worth it to see our friends.

Saturday 4/2: David took part of his work day to work on mosquito stuff and then worked in the office. He met us for lunch at the mall. I took the girls and a friend to the mall to look for mosquito nets, promising them 'play place' time and a good lunch afterward. No mosquito nets, but they had fun at the play place and at lunch.

Sunday 4/3: We went to a local gathering and met up with friends who were coming to see us. We had a great day with R and K, talking and talking, reconnecting. We went out for a good dinner right down the street and then had breakfast and more good talks Monday morning.

And there you have it, it is now the fourth, Poppy, CC, Laura, and Ryan arrive in 6 days, and Baby boy Coker arrives in 8 days! Stay tuned. We do have a name....yet to be announced.