Day 8 daddy away

The day started with the girls playing really well together...so much so that Soph hesitated wanting to do 'preschool' stuff, so...I let them keep playing, until they started getting antsy. But they were occupied in their 'houses' for quite a while. Love those little hands and feet.




On Fridays I read Sophia one chapter from 'A Child's History of the World'. We may read this through every year as a supplement. Really short chapters and well written. She probably doesn't hang with me for most of it, but then she will pipe in and ask a question. And today, the question was about war. (it was talking about the ancient civilizations of India, China, Egypt, and Mesopotamia and about wars). She said: 'I wonder when China will have another war...' and then I said I hope never, we would have to leave....she said 'when there is a war do we have to dig a hole and hide in it?' (I have no idea where that idea came from, but not bad), and then she said she was scared. I allayed her fears, with various comforting words and we moved on. The previous chapter she giggled every time I said the word 'berber'. I love teaching these chillins.

While Soph was at school I gave Tobin a bath....this boy:

he looks like a little man in this pic?!!!
Then I put Bella in the baby bath tub, she was begging, and I thought it would ease my night, so in she went. And because it was a baby bath I could be in and out and get stuff done. She did great. Then we ran out to get flowers for our tea party tomorrow.

Tomorrow is National day here in China. Here is how self absorbed I have been, I completely forgot what the date was. I asked our helper if she could work tomorrow afternoon. She hesitated and said yes (I knew she did not want to). Then K called and asked what I was doing with the week for Ayi, was I giving her off? The light bulb went on...oh my!

I immediately turned to her and said I am so sorry, I completely forgot, of course you can have tomorrow off, what about next week, do you need it off too?! OOPS. She was completely understanding and was happy, then we talked about what they would do to enjoy the holiday...

Sophia made some tang yuan at school today, have no idea what this is in English, sugar balls, round things that you make with dough, dip in 'sauce' and cook. Sophia loves them, they are 'okay' to me, and daddy, you better believe she is saving some for you. She also wants to save you some of the pumpkin gingerbread K made for us, but.....not sure it will last the day. Sorry.

For dinner I grilled chicken on the foreman:

this was marinaded in Dales's seasoning, yum. Kids love it.


Ayi stir fried broccoli, the only way to eat vegetables (except in a smoothie).


The meal looked pretty healthy, this is 'brown' rice from Thailand, have never found it here. Sophia quotes her cousin Anna every time we eat broccoli (which is often): 'we must eat the leaves off the trees.'

oh yes, yesterday Sophia got bit by a girl at school. From Sophia: 'my friend bit me. I was helping her tie the string on her dress and she bit me'
'did you cry?'
'yes....then the teacher made her cry'
'is she still your friend?'
'yes, she will always be my friend, I will always forgive her'

BUT today the 'mean' girl that Sophia often talks about came back up in conversation:
'she is always mean'
'to everyone?'
'yes'
'maybe she needs friends'
'she has four friends....but she won't let me play with them....I try not to look at her because I just no she will always be mean, so I just look away....but one day at dance when she saw we had the same shoes she was excited and played with me but not after that'
'what do you think about this, are you sad when she is mean, or what do you think?'
'I just don't know what to think about it' (she states this very matter-of-factly)

This was a great dinner conversation. Then we went outside to play, all three kids, from 6-7 p.m. (I have tried to do this every night)

'And that's a full lid' (David, I know you know what I am quoting here, anyone else want to guess?)

This is great

Sorry David, hope you don't mind, but I am referring everyone over to Aunt Laura's blog to see your baby pics among others. You can really see our kids in these I think: Click here.

Things I have forgotten...

Every time Sophia leaves for school she tells me something to tell Daddy if I skype with him:
'tell daddy that I love him more than anything' (M)
'tell daddy that I love him way bigger than anything but not bigger than Jesus' (T)
'tell daddy that I love him way bigger than these two buildings put together' (W)

Soph says one girl is mean to her at school and tells the other girls not to play with her. While this may make her a little mad she does not seem too upset about it. We have had multiple conversations about this.

Soph said going to dance makes her tired, but then she comes home and loves it.

Our Chinese tutor does not come anymore for the girls, she went to visit her family. Bella, however, is still becoming pretty bilingual.

My attempt to wrong injustice (feeble as it was). Last week when I dropped the kids off a man came running by with a weird smile on his face and a handful of something (money I suppose). He was being chased by a rounder man yelling: 'THIEF! THIEF!' I actually had time to think as I saw this unfold, what should I do? I let him run by, I was sure he would be caught and I did not need to be the one doing it. Sure enough around the corner came a cop on a moto (a traffic cop, they do not carry guns) and another moto with two other guys were also in pursuit. The guy is caught. I hear the yells, then I see the beating begin, this is not uncommon, unfair as it is. The cop has the guy and the other two guys are kicking him and hitting him with a water bottle. And me? I just plain feel sorry for this guy, he never stood a chance anyway, he was probably high, or thinking he needed to be. Now what do I do? I stop at the scene (it is a small street right by the school) and lay on my horn. I yell: 'don't hit him, it is not okay! don't hit him, you already caught him! It is not okay, it is not okay!' The beatings stop for a moment and one of the men says: 'but he is a thief.' I shake my head and reply: 'I know he is a thief, but you already caught him, you do not need to beat him.' He shrugged his shoulders and a taxi pulled up to take the thief to jail. So maybe the thief got one less kick, who knows. Some may ponder my view of justice here but I will just leave that out in la la land...

Kettle Bells= the death of me. (I am up to forty swings, 10 min warm up, 12 minute workout of intervals, totals 200 swings, and hamstrings that feel like they are going to fall off) (more on working out later)

No more pineapples=sadness and a long wait for strawberry season

Bella's new fave snack: mandarin oranges (they are not sweet yet, but she loves them) and cashews
Sophia's? Anything with peanut butter (she is her father's child)

Mid week musings

Our little calendar says 4 days left. And since the kids are all in bed, for me that means 3 until David returns.
Yesterday was a hard day in many ways, but I was so thankful for the Word, and friends, and even a few blog posts that had me in tears of thankfulness, joy, sadness too, but hopeful. Hopeful that all my failings are not forever, that forgiveness is real and awesome, from our Maker and from my four year old (yes, I had to ask her to forgive my short temper).

Mercies were so real and new this morning. I was determined to rest and rely on My Father to keep me calm, patient, and joyful, no matter what the day may bring. And He did, He is faithful.

A local friend came over tonight and we shared struggles and encouraged one another. It was so good.

Here is what the practicalities of today looked like:

• Tobin started kicking at 5:40 a.m. (this is so loud in a pack n play, which is his crib), I shut his door and did not get him up until 7:00 a.m.
  
• we ate toast with K's yummy strawberry jam (not sure there will be any left for you babe)
• As soon as Ayi arrived I let her take the girls down stairs to play so I could skype with Julie, awesome time, tough situations to discuss about family and parenting, but oh so good to see her face and be 'with' her in a way. She, too me, is the epitome of patience and joy. Learn so much from her. every. time.
• did some reading with Sophia and then eventually ate lunch...
• did some math and writing in the middle of the day
• sent sophia off to school
• when Ayi returned I went on a run (I pre-okayed this with David, taking half an hour to run while Soph is at school, just MW and maybe F)
• I promised the girls a tea party on sat to help celebrate our 'little lady' training that really has not been going on too much, but any excuse for a party
• bella helps me make cornbread for the chili
  
• Tobin gets fed, 3 meals, 5 nursings, and new these past two days: TWO naps.
  
• continued to give Tobin eye meds
• the evening: chili, Popsicle for dessert, and baths, then bed!
  

swimming but not ready to really crawl. With his chunky monkey legs not sure it will happen..


Weds is a late dinner night for us, so I fed Bella a cracker at 5:30ish while we waited for Sophia


he is a hoss.

Reluctant Monday

My impatient attitude started to rear its ugly head this morning, but I slowly and prayerfully cast it aside (mostly). We are doing fine. Bella's cold is in full force. Amazingly Sophia seems fine (she usually brings the junk home from school).

We had a good morning of K4 stuff, with Sophia starting handwriting a little more formally, she loved it (today), not to say she won't hate it tomorrow.

I don't have much to say for this reluctant Monday, I had to really trod my way through it and put on joy. But there was joy, and at the end of the day, as we danced to some great Swing music on the piano, and the girls danced (jumped) over Tobin who just stared in awe I giggled and boogied down too. Thankful grace is not based on my attitude but on a giving God.

The highlight of the day was skyping with Daddy two times! Both girls got a chance to chat with him. Tobin was sleeping both times. He is doing well and enjoying getting a little dose of good history.

Saigon


At a Mexican place that he says does not rival Miguel's of Chiang Mai, 'but the chips were good'

The only pics I took today were of Tobin's eye for the doc. It is oozing goozing out gunk like it has done most of his life, just moreso now! Gross.

These were from yesterday: macala with Sophia (who beats me fair and square). Yes, we do wash those Gator shirts, and no I do not pick them out for her.


Tobin has found his feet, this is new since daddy has been gone. When I started putting them up towards his face he just laughed and laughed.

It is 7:56 p.m. and I am all done. Except I need to feed Tobin again, and check on the girls, who seem to be chatty this evening. But If I could I would go to bed. Right. now.

End of the weekend

my self portrait, as promised. Love you Dawei!

Then I let Sophia have a go with our big camera:

In BAD need of a hair cut. Dare I go local again, I have had a fair share of mishaps...


morning time making of a horse with pillows.


then I started reading them Black Beauty, and we acted out the first chapter.

I happened around the corner and found Sophia really reading this book to Bella. She was sounding out the words and doing pretty well. It is blurry, but just have to note the NC State barrettes and Gator shirt. State did not fare so well this week (on Thurs), while the Gators beat Kentucky!


Today was a little tougher just because I did not have much planned and chaos could ensue if I was not careful. But we did a variety of things that made it very pleasant: horse riding, family reading and singing, read-alouds, played macala (marble game), played 'go-fish', went outside two times, and watched a short video that K lent us today that is a 'reading' video.

I tried to take a nap both Sat and today to no avail. Sophia asks 'do you take naps every day?' I told her no, but sometimes on the weekends I do and since I was tired I was trying to rest.

Bella has been extreme in her 'scaredness' not wanting the door shut all the way. So I leave it cracked (though it looks like it is closed). I will have to nip this in the bud. She always says things like: 'there are bad guys' or 'there is a big bad wolf'. Hmm....

Sophia says Vietnam is just over the mountains and over them again...I guess she is not too far off. She asked if when she gets older we will let her hike up a mountain by herself.

I think tomorrow night we will eat with J and K possibly.
Six full days. But then who is counting?

Via Satellite

The night David left he called, still in China. Honestly I did not know his itinerary, I thought it was a straight shot to Saigon. Oops. He was pretty on schedule then and said something like: 'well, it is certainly easier traveling alone, but then you are still alone, I think I prefer the mafan (trouble) of traveling with three kids in tow.' Then later he emailed me, after many delays he arrived at his destination at 2 a.m. I thought: 'yeah, probably not.' I was thankful he made it, but thankful we decided against doing a little SE Asian vacation with littles right now. Thankful just for home. And of course missing him!
Here are some pics he sent of an evening meal out:

I love the self portrait, and decided I would participate (next post)

Sophia thought this pic looked like yummy food. Indeed!



I thought this looked good!

My posts will get more random from now on, the weekend is ending, back to more routine tomorrow (as much routine as we can find), no more play by play (that just gets boring, I know). But I will keep posting as long as wits (and time) remain.

Minute by minute

3:57 a.m.: Thunder wakes up Bella who wakes up Sophia, who tries to comfort her who then calls for me. It took me awhile to go back to sleep, the rain was so hard I thought I would not hear if the girls called again.

5:07: Tobin wakes up, I close his door, he keeps crying. I feed him, he is hungry. I have no idea about this...makes for a weary morning. I turn off my alarm that was set for 6 a.m.

7:04: Sophia calls, we all go in the living room and lay down for a little while longer. I will let Tobin sleep until 8

7:15: I read the word and tell the girls I MUST feed on it first...Ps 106, good good.

7:30: heat up coffee cake and devour, yum. Bella, weirdo that she is, eats half and opts for fruit instead, health nut.

8:00: clean up, I nurse Tobin, girls sweep (haphazardly)

8:15: girls 'dress up' and I put on 'sing over me' album. Sophia wears her headband with fake blond curly hair attached and tells me of a classmate who has pig tails like that (fake) and how she is not supposed to bring them to school.

8:30 Tobin eats brown rice cereal and half a banana.

9:00: Ayi arrives, says there was a pretty big earthquake last night, maybe at 3 a.m. I am thinking that could be what woke up Bella...so glad I did not feel it, I need nothing fear-inducing right now. Fort/house making ensues

9:35: Tobin goes down for a nap, I check the college football schedule

10:21: "mommy I bet everyone in the world can hear this thing (our washing machine), do you think so?". Probably (it is LOUD)

10:25: went outside to play, played in water puddles again, and collected some greenery to put in a vase back home. (note: Sophia really wants to grow things)

11:15: nurse Tobin, get ready for lunch. Grilled cheese and carrots. (I will make a smoothie tonight). Bella opts for PB and J, along with Ayi, who still has an aversion to cheese.

11:45: eat lunch, remove Bella from high chair to other chair, put Tobin in Highchair feed him brown rice cereal with carrots

12-1 p.m.: play 'airplane': I hoist the girls up (one at a time) holding their hands putting their hips on my feet, (I am on my back lying on the ground) I did this until my hamstrings could no longer take it. We read aloud and put everyone to bed.

1 p.m. just as I dozed off Sophia called for me. I gave her some books and could not doze anymore. Drank a little Pepsi Max

2 p.m. allow Soph to come out and read to her some, Tobin wakes up, nurses.

2-3:30: give snacks, fruit, with a planned outing to eat a popsicle. Alas, the sun is blazing, we stay in, I promise the indoor pool after a grocery store run.

As Sophia was coming out from behind the highchair she somehow nudged the electrical outlet loose, like so:

this is bad because it is so low to the ground for all grasping hands to get into, unlike our other one like this which is high up in our second bathroom:

An eyesore, to be sure, but it is out of reach, out of mind, out of use (yes, we know, it still needs to be fixed)

3:30: Ayi returns, I run to the store, return and pump up the floor to the pool, this another opportunity for upper body workout.

4:00 the pool fun lasts about 40 minutes then I debate out loud what to do for dinner. We have plenty of left overs but I am thinking pulled noodles. In the end I let Sophia show Ayi where the place is and they bring it back, they give us the dish you always order, which was delicious. (I told Ayi that when they saw Sophia they would know what to order).

6:05: we start a family movie night, earlier in the day Sophia said: 'we cannot have a family movie night without our whole family, daddy is not here, we cannot have one!'

7:00: a local friend comes over to play with the girls and hang out with me. The girls loved playing with her, though they did get geared up before bed. I let Sophia brush Bella's teeth and she mimicked me exactly, our friend about fell on the floor laughing.

7:35: Bella has had no fever all day, just a very runny nose, but at bed she really starts to cry, she says she is scared, we go back and forth, I just say: 'I will leave the door cracked', and all was fine. Our friend stayed an hour and we had a really good chat.

play by play at least for a day

• I didn't expect the genuine sadness by Sophia that resulted in crying on and off for 30 minutes, and the hugging of your backpack, I made her put it back and then let her go hug it one more time. This got my thoughts going in the wrong direction (what if something happens to you and...) I captured those with truth (wow so thankful those thoughts have not touched me until then, and then away they went) and moved to manage the situation at hand.

• Sophia had a small altercation with bella, and then the sadness started. Tried to get outside but it rained so up we came, and I decided a video would distract, within 1 hr of your leaving I put on a video, is that failure? It didn't feel like it to me, it was only the last 15 minutes of cinderella in Chinese. And it took her mind off of you. She even said, I forgot daddy was gone. To which I said, good that is okay, he will be back soon.
• We went back outside and found a snail slugging down the sidewalk, this captivated us for a good 35 minutes. Our neighbor stopped for a bit and started touching it, so we did too, it was so cool, Bella would not touch it, she just kept trying to feed it leaves. It had a beautiful brown-yellow shell, and we stood amazed at God's creation.
• Sophia kept telling this story which she told you on the phone: 'when the snail dies I will take its shell, put it in my back pack and take a trip to the beach and leave it there'. She named the snail 'stooby water', our neighbor, who speaks a little english thought she said 'stupid', and clarified in Chinese. I said, no, she is just making up a funny name. she told this same story (about taking it to the beach) to our neighbor in Chinese as well, who had a good laugh.
• Bella has a slight fever from a cold virus to be sure. Tobin's sniffles are lingering as well, but doesn't seem to bothered. While I was getting the girls ready for nap, I left him to roll on the carpet for less than 45 seconds and I came back to find him gnawing on an extension cord (yes, I am up for mother of year).
• I was able to do my Kettle Bell workout (ouch!), and Ayi will come back early so I can take Sophia and Caleb to school! (Next week, the JACK family will take and pick all week, THANKS)

Afternoon:

• I made coffee cake for breakfast tomorrow, because I know the morning will be busy. We ordered shushu's for dinner and I went to get the kids from school. I have loved this week of taking and picking up Sophia and Caleb, the best conversations happen in the car (or in this case on my electric bike), they chat about school, naughty kids, friends, etc.
• Sophia said that there are two naughty boys in her class that really make her teacher mad. Then she said some kids don't call her by her name they call her: Ke hui kay (?) I don't quite know why, but I do know they all know her name. she said: "I think they are making fun of me," this led to a good conversation. She also asked as we went down the stairs of her school: 'how do people know I am a wai guo ren (foreigner)?' This was also a great discussion, I told her, among other things, that we look different, our skin is white, and she looked down at her skin to compare to the others. She gets this every day, it is nothing new, the constant phrase that we hear is: 'such white beautiful skin, like a doll', but maybe she didn't fully grasp what that phrase in Chinese was, she just knows she is one?!
• Sophia prayed for you to come back quickly on special breakfast day.
• When asked what they wanted you to know from their day: From Sophia: we saw a snail today and went and touched its ears and they went in his head, and we touched his shell and his head went inside his shell. We are counting down to whenever you come back and we made coffee cake for tomorrow and we will probably save some for you whenever you come back, because that will be special breakfast day.
• From Bella: daddy, I'm drinking
• From me: the cards you left on each of our pillows were precious, Sophia found hers and LOVED it, I think it really helped her, she then wondered if Tobin had one, and I said: 'I doubt it' but then I found one for him too (too sweet), and mine on my pillow! Thank you for such thoughtfulness and incredible leadership of our family.
• everyone is in bed (7:45 p.m.) I will finish this up, read for awhile and maybe watch an old 'West Wing'.

In pictures:

Bella dances around in her 'skirt' (the cover to the piano), and when the song is over she bows and says: 'xie xie dajia' (thank you everyone), this is adorable! Ayi and I laugh every single time.



Tobin joins in the afternoon laughter.


the noodle shop that opened up across from Sophia's school


The Toys R Us that opens up daily at 5 across the gate from her school


The milk lady sets out milk, yogurt, etc. right outside the school gate too.


Parents gather, but gates do not open at all until 5 p.m. sharp!


After dinner I took the kids down stairs to play. Sophia opted to play inside xinyao's house with Caleb, I could easily go in and check on her. Bella, Tobin and I stayed outdoors, it was cool and about to rain. In fact I had to interrupt Sophia's time to go inside because of rain, she fussed a little but got control, and then we had a good end to our evening.


Tobin in the stroller downstairs.


Sophia interrupted her 'nighttime routine' by putting on winter PJs and having a good laugh. Too hot for those, dear, and she went and changed.

9 days without Daddy

David leaves tomorrow morning for 9 days. I can honestly say that I am not anxious, this a gift of grace to me! I hope to post daily for him to see what we are doing, but who knows, I may just go flop on the couch and eat bon bons every night.

Snakes and spiders

Sophia really wants me to blog about this:
The other day on an evening run I almost stepped on a snake crossing the road (it was about dark). It didn't really even startle me, I just saw it slither across the road just about under my foot. It was maybe 4 feet long and super thin. I honestly forgot about it the rest of the run, until David asked how my run was. Sophia thought this was super cool and scary. I told her I dislike spiders more...

and speaking of Spiders....
Every other weekend or so we do 'family movie night', possibly not even that often. But last weekend we borrowed the latest Charlotte's web movie and we all really enjoyed it. And it just spurred Sophia's (and now Bella's) love for spiders. We have quite a few small spiders in our house and today Bella started petting one (no lie), and then Sophia said 'its Joy, its Joy' (we often do this, name the little spiders we see with the names of Charlotte's children in the book), 'let's get her some food', Sophia continued. I asked her what spiders eat, and she said 'flies', then she went to get fake food from her kitchen, a big plastic carrot, and put it by 'Joy'. I just watched this whole scene and laughed.

Footprints from the weekend

I try to get the girls outside every morning. And while the rainy season has limited that some, we still manage to get out and play even if it is drizzling a little. This day was not humid at all and almost had some coolness to it...felt so good.


they got on their cars and first went with me to buy fruit and popsicles just outside our gate.


Sophia said: can we take our shoes off and play in the puddles? I just knew she was expecting a 'no', I cannot ever remember letting them do this. So I surprised her with a 'yes' and they LOVED it. I joined in on the action, and we compared foot prints.





The rest of the weekend was not too eventful, except I know I despaired some (read: cried a good cry) of parenting failures. But man, what a man I have. He just points me to the cross every time, the good news--INCREDIBLE news, that this life is not dependent on me! It took some time, and gentle rebuking words, but I was encouraged and renewed by truth applied to my weary soul.

And what tender souls God has put us in charge of, always looking for FUN:



Big Boxes, a kid's best friend. We ended up making houses out of them, doors, windows and all!


I leave you with this

(I would have put Tobin on top but Bella is not to be trusted!)