Mother's Day

Indeed it is almost Father's Day and I am just getting around to discussing our Mother's Day event.

I mark it here because I was actually, genuinely surprised. 

Our three-week guest and another guest left the day before Mother's Day and we were ready for down time. David let me sleep in and was busy in the kitchen when I got up. Little did I know it was all a ploy. He even turned the oven on to throw me off. I reminded him that you have to watch stuff carefully in our oven. Then he admitted that they planned to take me out for breakfast. I thought we were going out for noodles and egg pancakes. 

Instead he had arranged for the manager of the new foreign-owned guest house in town to open it just for us. They cooked us a full-on breakfast, bacon, eggs, croissants, fruit, coffee, all SO delicious. And this was doubly sweet because these workers had just housed our guests and could have rested that day themselves. These two ladies loved us well and sat down with us for a bit (they are dear friends). Our kids played with some of the toys there and we really had a pleasant morning. 

Back at home the kids each gave me their cards, even Gabrielle...

 Sophia helped Tobin with his, it was pretty clever.

Bella drew a picture of me in a castle and explained it all to me.

G threw a big fit...

 She looks skinny minnie here because she had been super sick.

 Oh the drama....

 Then we all laughed and told her to point to her nose. I think she ended up picking it instead. This girl is HI-larious.

I had a blessed Mother's Day and am so thankful for David's planning and the kids showering me with such love...God has truly blessed this Mama of four.

Village Wedding

I arrived back in our town to Gabrielle throwing up. She got Bella's virus. But for her it lingered and went into something else. Already tiny to begin with, she didn't have much weight to lose, and she lost it all. We consulted with docs and finally got her on the mend. We were so thankful, it was scary there for a little bit.

Our helper took five days off to help with a wedding, and of course invited us. David had to go up the mountain to check on our Chinese Medicine Project, so I went ahead without him. 

I was confident things would be just fine. I could handle my own with four kids at a village wedding, for a little while anyway....

Tobin, with minority bag across his shoulder, walked in like he owned the place.

Our helper came out to greet us and we went right in. We decided to wait for David to eat, he was arriving soon. Most village weddings we have been to take place partly at the bride's house and partly at the groom's house. There are a ton of traditions that go on at each place. This was the second wedding we had been to in this village and they do the entire big meal on the temple grounds. This made it hard to 'get away from the crowd' so to speak. The ladies crowding around I didn't mind so much, I could even understand most of what they were saying and could chit chat a little teeny bit back.

But it was the men. 

11:30 a.m. and they had passed around the rice liquor bowl one too many times. A few of them stumbled through my lot of kids, loudly, and abruptly, and I was now uneasy. I looked to our helper for escape. 'Let's go to my house' she said. And I agreed. But David was actually pulling up at that moment so we just waited for about ten minutes back at the gate. Here, it was kids that were doting on Baby G. and things calmed down a bit. 

The temple in the back ground.

Yes, my pride was taken down a notch, and I realized I did not put the kids in the best situation. It wasn't dangerous, it just wasn't appropriate. We have been around plenty of crowds, and plenty of drunk people, but always with David by my side wiser and physically stronger!
We then went in together to a far corner to eat. We were able to visit with many people, some drunk, most not. We had a pleasant meal and returned home in time for naps!

Mama's Weekend Away: The Return and THANK YOU!

This whole weekend would not have been made possible without all of our incredible husbands!!!

They deserve a HUGE THANK YOU!!!

David kept telling me how much grace he experienced in parenting and everything while I was gone. Our guest came over and played with kids, they all ate up the chicken pie and lasagna. David continued to take care of Bella and her virus, and was able to get a TON of work done. Grace upon grace. 

My trip back was comparatively smooth. I made it in less than five hours. 

I listened to Dr. Sailhamer on Exodus most of the way and felt like he was just sitting right there in the car with me, cracking jokes and telling me the deeper meanings of the Pentateuch in such an easy to understand and encouraging way. Love him. 

Here is where they maneuvered us to the other lane (the reason coming I had to get off the highway)

Here is a fun truck filled with really fat pigs.

Here is a huge mosque right off the highway

Because one of these ladies is moving back to the States this summer, a retreat with these particular people will never happen again. So I count this a very special opportunity and was so blessed to be a part of it.

Mama's Weekend Away: The Event Part 2 Mountain Hike

On Saturday, once again we meandered into our morning. The morning session was a Q & A with SM and everyone adding in their tidbits. 

This was where we seven ladies started laying it down and getting real. I was so thankful for the bravery to ask some of these questions and the Spirit's leading and encouragement as everyone answered from their own wisdom and experience. Truly priceless.

We decided to just snack our way through lunch and get going on our afternoon activity. Everyone but the two ladies that brought babies decided to take the cable car up the mountain. Nine years ago we did this. It was absolutely NOT the same. This cable car was enclosed, six could fit inside, and it went incredibly HIGH. Once we got off, the areas to hike were very well kept, you could even hike about 10 km on an almost flat walkway. We hiked for a bit, talked a lot and slowly made our way back. 

This was just what we needed, great time to enjoy creation and really breathe deep. 

The cable car:

The view:

A caged monkey at the top, trying to make a buck.

The giant Checker board

This was an amazing little pool of crystal clear water..

There is a lake way off in the distance

In the cable car on the way back

Back in old town

Another animal trying to make a buck:

We ate dinner early and answered the question: "How did you end up where you are?" More great insights into the lives of these ladies and their stories.
The evening session was a "My Favorite Things" session. I stole this idea from the Homeschool conference where every afternoon they go through every subject and people talk about their fave things. I made this a 'bring a book and tell us why we should read it' and then we went through many other things we loved, this was anything from toothbrushes to recipes to blogs to bedsheets, not kidding! This was a super fun time of sharing, I learned so much and can't wait to read some of the recommended books.

This pretty much ended our time together, the morning had everyone wrapping up and heading out. I was SO thankful for the opportunity to go away for the weekend with some people that God has really used to challenge and encourage me.

Mama's Weekend Away: The Event Part 1

The view from Sleepyfish Guest house.
The weather was PERFECT.

The evening of my arrival I was absolutely SPENT. I sprawled on the bed for about 15 minutes, mustered the strength to make my way into 'the city', and was SO glad I did. I had a very short but precious time with SK and then went to EP's for dinner. I talked with D and P way past my ability to think straight. Who really knows what I said, but I still count it as a highlight. This couple challenges me and encourages me in so many ways.

SC did a great job leading in music. And with such a fabulous setting...nothing but rooftop praise!

On Thursday I ventured to the airport, which can barely be called 'in the city'. It was a bit of a drive, but around a lake with some great views. I loved the drive. I picked up three folks who were arriving that morning and we all got to hang out the rest of the day until others arrived.

We headed into old town to look around and found this quaint park right in the middle.

The actual festivities began at dinner. Four of Seven seen below. Precious ladies.

The event schedule went something like this:
Thursday dinner: I asked everyone to share how they came to know and love JC. Each of our meal 'questions' were ways to help us get to know each other's journey story, and I grew to love this time, filled with laughter and tears alike.

Thursday evening I introduced the group to our schedule and used my Kettle Bell as an analogy of slow strength (the mantra of KB gurus)....a little like 'A Slow Obedience in the Same Direction' we talked about what was needed for us to thrive and grow. I did not actually do a demo, it was simply an object lesson to help me share my heart in about ten minutes of what I hoped our take-aways would be for the weekend.

THEN we played a little 'get to know you game', the competitive spirit came out a bit as we learned each others fave books/movies/candy/color, etc.

It was close to 11 when we packed it in....Then I stayed up way too late talking/getting to know my roomie. That is what this weekend was all about.

Thankfully, whoever masterfully crafted the schedule (Ahem, ME) Did not have anything starting in the mornings until 10 A.M. !!!

Breakfast of good coffee and whatever you wanted. BACON was on the menu, a real treat!
We gathered at 10 a.m. for music and time with SM, who shared her heart and love for us and HIM and how He works....I shared many of her stories with David. I was very encouraged by this time and thankful for her candidness.

Lunch out: Best hamburgers in Asia, or at least China. Serendipity Diner, Old Town. We finished up the discussion of how we each came to know the Father. And this discussion turned deep and eye opening, it helped me see God's grace in my own life and childhood, it helped me re-evaluate some parenting ideas, and get to know these ladies even more. I was very thankful for their openness and wisdom. Each person had something unique and helpful to offer.

Friday afternoon was shopping: old town, wal mart, etc. We split up. For those of us who don't have a wal-mart we went there and grabbed what we could.
By 4ish we met up with everyone else at EP's house for what proved to be a highlight to the weekend. She opened her home (and all her cupboards, etc.) and her heart to share with us tips for organizing our homes and using purpose in our spaces. She did a great job of helping us discuss ideas while staying true to our own personalities and family dynamics. I came back with great ideas and completely re-did our living room/Home school room and it has helped so much! (My whole Clean-up/Clean out/simplify is for another post)

We all went out to a nice dinner, EP joined us along with two other ladies who had made the trip. This was perfect because the meal question was: 'How did you meet your husband?' Talk about some hilarious stories!

That night was game night. G did a great job of organizing this!

At the restaurant:

Mama's weekend away: Road Trip

I started my drive around 7:30. I started it with Rend Collective blasting and my cup of coffee. 

I knew how many kilometers it was to the Highway so that I would know if I missed it. 

Those first 45 minutes to an hour are winding roads, beautiful scenery, and cars passing cars on blinding curves. It is not enough to pay attention to the cars in the other lane, you could, even in your own lane, have a car coming at you head on who was passing another car around a curve. I knew all of this and kept my head in the game. 

There was also the drug checkpoint, which made me nervous. People don't really travel alone here. I am a foreign woman...The Army guy with the big gun was friendly enough and tried out all his English on me. They were completely taking apart another car, removing seats and all. They photocopied my passport and sent me on my way. with this bit of English: "Have a pleasant journey."

About forty minutes in, an engine light starts flashing. 

Text David. "J, says that is normal, it is fine."

A little bit later another one comes on. Text David (stop texting and driving!)

I am on the highway now, yeah, I made that turn!

I was literally driving into the clouds. It was gorgeous.

I decide to put on the audio book "You and Me Forever" by Francis Chan. I listened to this almost the rest of the way. It was awesome, if you haven't read it, please do!!! David had listened to it when I was laid up with the flu, thought we should discuss it, and finally I got around to starting it on my runs and was really challenged by it. We hope to go through it together this year!

I finally call David, because texting and driving is never a good idea. I thought it could be a transmission thing. I did not want to be driving our friends' car with no oil in it or something dreadful like that that could destroy the engine.
'Do you know how to check oil?' David asked.
'Yes, my dad did teach me that!' (a useful skill, folks, thanks dad!)
'Be careful on the highway, make sure you are on a flat road, not an incline, and just know the engine will be very hot, so use a cloth of some sort.' I laughed and told him he sounded just like my dad.
But I will admit I was a little nervous.

Somewhere in there, about two hours in, Bella's teacher calls. She is throwing up at school.
Hmmmm....how is my plan working out so far? I contemplate turning around. Now David's day and possible rest of the week is interrupted/messed up/ruined. Not really, but I consider all the possibilities and take a deep breath while I break the bad news to David.

David gets Bella and Tobin and takes them home. Bella does have a virus and remains sick the next few days, only throwing up a few times. Tobin ended up staying home on Thursday with Bella. This did not fare well, 'he was a naughty boy' Sophia told me. 'What did he do?' I asked. 'Too many things to name." She replied. He went to school all day on Friday.

David is able to work his full days in spite of a sick child, and she is well taken care of.

Meanwhile, back on the road....
I decide to stop in the bigger city on the way to check the oil, instead of pulling off on the side of the road (what if I needed help?). This has me get off the highway a bit, so I pay attention to every turn. I pull into a gas station and they won't let me check it there. I pull behind the gas station near a bus station, next to a bus with a lady who happens to be the driver's helper. She gets down and watches me. We talk about the oil and possible engine trouble. The Father sent her there to reassure me. It looked like the car had plenty of oil, she definitely thought so too. I thanked her and went on my way.

Cruising along, making good time. Until we are directed to get off the highway on to the old road. I knew this was a possibility and knew it would slow my time. The roads are narrow, mountainous, bumpy, and would now be holding lots of big trucks plus me and others all on our way...

I was hoping the detour was well marked. I did text other friends, G and E at this point for moral support. It wasn't really well-marked but I could read the signs (Whew).
This was the first road. Not even paved. gravel dirt and muddy, it had been raining, and did rain that weekend also. This was when I was really thankful I was in the big SUV I was in.

Then the road changed and we really started cruising again. Not that bad, I thought, it will take longer but it won't be that bad.

Here is an example of passing on a blind curve:

Have I mentioned yet that there are LOTS of big trucks?

Narrow mountain road, bumpy, BIG trucks. And still we are doing okay. This is because coming down the mountain, southbound, the highway is still open. So, all of us going northbound go up in two lanes, following everyone else. This works fine for awhile....until...


You guessed it, someone decides to use the old road to go South. More than one person actually, and a few big trucks at that.

Dead stand still:

For Hours.

I am texting back and forth (which is safe because we are not moving). Early in the morning one friend texted; "lifting you up....asking that the day is not stressful in any way but surprisingly relaxing..."

There is the red truck coming down the mountain.
I text my friend back, tell her we will probably arrive at the same time, she plans on arriving tomorrow. She tells me to eat my snacks for the retreat...
Her text (after engine lights, Bella sick, and the off-road fiasco): "so my prs from this morning are answered differently than I hoped. Yikes!!! Be careful! Just don't fall off the mountain. I really want to see you tomorrow."

Falling off of the mountain was not a stretch, she knows Chinese mountain roads.
I decided that if need be I would hike over to that little farm house (that you can't see in my pic) and stay the night.

What I wanted to do was take control of the situation, walk up the mountain and start directing traffic. I was certain I could fix things, help people move their cars so we could get through. I had a ton of money in my car. And all the drivers getting out of their cars/trucks were men mainly. Suddenly I didn't feel so certain of myself. I got out a few times, talked to various people, who couldn't believe I was traveling alone. This is something the Chinese do not do. But they were all friendly, and I really did not feel scared.

Every time we moved a little, this black exhaust from the bus in front engulfed my car.
I texted Dave that I would spend the night in a village...and that I really had to pee, but that a bunch of men were standing around.

Then  a traffic police guy walked by and, I kid you not, told us to reverse down the mountain. I did laugh out loud.

Here is the thing. Most Chinese really just learned to drive in the past 5-10 years, except maybe big truck drivers. Really good at U-turns anywhere, really bad at reverse. Add that to narrow mountain road, steep cliff, big trucks. The cars started doing ten point turns in whatever little space they could to go back down. I hoped the bus' brakes would hold.

My next text: 'this should be on a TV show'.
My friend: "At least you have a great story for your blog. Our lives are getting to easy over here anyway."
Me: 'stop making me laugh, I will pee in my pants.'

We reverse for a little bit. Then forward motion and another stand still.
On the side of the mountain I see a little place to buy things. I ask to use their bathroom. She points me across the road to this:

That is the Chinese character for female/women. At least there was a women's and a men's.

I would have just gone out in the grass except for this:

All the drivers were standing around (that is the "bathroom" behind them....) Behind the trees, very steep drop-off.
Worst bathroom ever.

Finally we get moving, after about three hours of what I consider to be an amazing, but not atypical Asian road adventure.

Before reaching Dali, we were able to get back on the highway. I was extremely tired, from a short nights' sleep and the intense driving. I blasted Josh Garrels this time and made it all the way to the guest house without a hitch!

What I was most stressed out about, getting lost, was never a problem. Road delays, etc. while on my radar, never caused anxiety. The Father knows what He is doing and how to protect and guide. He did that for me, kept me calm, and even had me laughing in the midst of what was a frustrating situation...and yes, it does make a good blog story.

Mama's Weekend Away: The PREP

I volunteered to plan a ladies retreat, then someone was going to plan a bigger one in another country, then that got nixed and I got asked. With gusto I planned a trip for seven ladies, all moms of 2-6 kids (numbering 25 kids in all, with one on the way! WHOA). 

In other words, we all needed a little 'respite', a little 'rest', a little 'down time', something we each rarely get. 

When I volunteered, I had various ideas in my brain about the fun of it all, but when it came down to it, the pressure was on. This was the 'first annual' or 'first ever' event for this group of ladies and I could not disappoint! Not to mention it was in an unfamiliar city to us all and the logistics itself was a little daunting at first. I was also in charge of 'smoothness'. 

But these ladies are fabulous and flexible and patient, and I asked them many ideas, and even though I did feel some pressure about it all, in the end, I knew it would be just what the Father would have for us, no matter how smoothly or messy it went! 

Here was the other clincher: This was David's absolute busiest time of the year. I mean if ever there was a time I needed to be home it was this time. 

We had a guest for three weeks helping David. He didn't stay with us, but he was at our house a lot and almost every meal. That sounds stressful. He was probably one of the easiest and best guests we have ever had. He became like a part of our family for thosethree weeks. He has five kids, so he knows the drill, he has lived in China a long time, and had some incredible stories to share. They had planned the three week help and then I planned the retreat around that. Then they changed their dates. David assured me it would be fine. And so I planned accordingly, with guilty feelings still lingering.

I made: two loaves of banana bread, six loaves of poppy seed bread, 8 loaves of pumpkin gingerbread (all for David to take to work these three weeks, though I was only going to be gone 5 days), froze Lasagna, chicken pot pie, and arranged our kids to go to school all day and our helper to be here whenever David was not (which would be almost all day, every day). All of that was easier said than done. In the end we decided that Sophia would carpool with a neighbor morning and afternoon. And to avoid David having to take/pick up/take/pick up Tobin and Bella, I planned their afternoon time at home, giving our Ayi many ideas to keep them occupied and out of trouble. 

Meanwhile I was trying to come up with the best options for an encouraging time with the Ladies. We had one lady, our 'leader' so to speak, coming from Thailand, who would encourage us in the word, everyone else was traveling in-country. I made the reservations, tweaked the rooms (two ladies were bringing babies), made sure there was a place to meet, etc. One lady volunteered to play guitar for us, and the 'sessions' would be facilitated by me but led by others. 

One of the ladies, and close friend, G, came up with the great idea of having a friend of ours who lives in the retreat city lead a session on 'organizing your home' because she is a master at it. I started discussing this with E as an option and she agreed! Also on the agenda: shopping, eating good western food, games, and rest. 

But there was another big stresser: I was driving to the retreat in our team mates car all by myself. I was actually not stressed by the driving itself, though it is UNLIKE driving on an American road (Poppy and CC thought I was crazy for doing this). I was more stressed I would get lost, miss the highway turn and end up in Tibet (literally, since I was headed that way). David printed me a good Google Map and driving directions, the old fashioned way. I packed my snacks and all the other things and decided to leave a full day early. Wednesday morning by 7:30 I was out of the door. My plan was to get there in 5-6 hours, get my bearings around Dali old town, then go into the big town and visit two friends....I would wake up refreshed, have some good down time and then greet those arriving in morning or afternoon, to start the retreat by dinner time. 

'My plan' was not 'THE plan' however, and to read about the fun adventure the Father took me on...stay tuned for the Road Trip!