There is a grandma that lives in our school who is quite aggressive. Sophia used to be okay with her, but not anymore...she runs every time she hears her call her name, she clings to my leg and does the peek around to see if she will bite. She is harmless (mostly), but Sophia doesn't know it yet. I am trying to do better in these situations, be calm, love, really converse, show Sophia that all is okay. This lady is actually our friend, more than just an acquaintance, so that makes this even harder.
Yesterday as I was outside with Sophia playing, this grandma beckoned us into her house. Before Sophia could see, I prepared her: "Sophia there's ---, lets go see her for just a minute and then we will finish playing." She slowly obliged. The first thing Nai Nai (grandma in chinese) gave her was a little cake (good thinkin' there). We went into her house where she put on music and started showing us a special local dance. She has been trying for awhile to get me to come over to teach me how to do this dance (I can go back to America and teach it others, she says). That was fine, Sophia sat quietly, no smiles, no dancing, just eating. I got up and tried the dance (mainly to show Sophia that it was okay to be Nai Nai's friend). Then Nai Nai forced one of her dresses on me, Sophia started getting uneasy (she wasn't the only one). I kept telling Nai Nai "I will have to think about it, I don't know...if I want to learn..." (it was a polite, no way!).
As we were going out the door Nai Nai literally hit me 7 times on the shoulder, more forceful than a pat, not quite a punch, it moved my body weight. She was just trying to convince me that I needed to dance...look what it did for her, it is great exercise, etc. etc. She even said 'you walk every day, it has no meaning,' I, in all pride, said, 'actually I run.' I wanted to say: 'and I am skinnier than you too.'
Finally we got out of there. I had to debrief this whole episode with Sophia whose eyes were wide with fear:
'she was not hurting mommy, she was just excited about what she was saying.'
'but why?' 'why she do like that?'
and on the conversation went, with all the 'but whys?' you could imagine.
honestly Sophia, I have no idea.
(But I kept that truth to myself.)
